I Develop A New Get Rich Quick Plan

My old plan, which consisted largely of procuring Powerball tickets, doesn't seem to be working all that well. As you may well have already guessed by my attention to blogging, my Yankee work ethic is sorely lacking as well, so I'm not going to get rich the old fashioned way either. All together now "They eeeeeeaaaaarrrrrnnnn it" Ah, John Houseman, where have you gone. And I'll bet right now that at least three of you are thinking "Who the fuck is John Houseman?"

No, my new plan is to wrote a novel, sign a three book deal and option the screen-play to Hollywood for the first book. Now, as someone with the literary ability of a drunken chimpanzee, this would ordinarily be a pretty far-fetched plan. But I have clued in to a secret known to but a few.

Plagiarism.

Yep, I'm just gonna rip-off pre-existing best sellers, change the title and the character names, and go from there. Just like that former hot shot 17 year old author from Harvard who wrote "How Opal Metha Got Laid" or some such drivel and was hailed as the next great young American author, and then it turned out that she'd written a book suspiciously close to at least four other books with similar themes. As in verbatim chunks transferred from the earlier novels to hers.

I think I can avoid the discovery of my plagiarism by picking more obscure novels to rip-off. Nope, I won't be borrowing from well-known "chick-lit", (I did not make that phrase up), books, but older novels that no one reads anymore. For instance, here's the opening to my first efforts, a gripping tale of madness and revenge on the high seas during crabbing season: "Call me Ishmael...." What do you think? It's winner isn't it?