Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Another Great Leap Forward for Women's Athletics

Danica Patrick's meltdown during a race this weekend was one of the funniest things I've seen, and had to set back women athletes about 15 years. What an idiot she is.

For those of you who may have missed it, Danica wasn't having a good race. She pulled her car over, (or it stalled; I just saw the lowlights), and proceeded to have a full-on temper tantrum. Her in-car camera shows her beating her little fists on the steering wheel. She gets out of the car and beats said fist against her legs, then, and I shit you not, actually stamps her feet on the ground. Then she threw her helmet and some other equipment to the ground, but couldn't even do that right. There was no velocity behind the throw, and she looked like a five year old who was just at the ned of her rope and couldn't hold onto her toys anymore. And I know because I have a five year old and I've seen her do that.

Now, I don't watch racing, and I don't even regard it as a sport. It's driving around in a circle really fast, that's about it. If you've got the fastest car and the best pit crew, you'll probably win. But Patrick is probably one of the two best known female athletes in the US right now, and if she wants to be taken seriously as a driver, throwing a hissy fit on national TV probably isn't the way to do it. For christ's sake, kick the crap out of the car, but stay away from stomping your feet and beating your fists. You look like a five year old.

On the plus side, in an interview afterwards she did manage to avoid blaming the Jews. Unlike some well-known male-type folks who may have had trouble involving cars in the recent past.

14 Comments:

Blogger Nonny said...

I hate Danica. One of my friends went to an Indy race specifically to see her (it was a guy btw) and she was a total bitch to her fans. Wouldn't give them the time of day. I'm gonna have to hunt that little video down and take a looksy.

I agree circle track racing is retarded, but drag racing, now there's some real excitement!

9:05 AM  
Blogger Syd said...

There's actually quite a bit more to racing, but honestly I don't care enough about it to defend it.

Regarding Danica, I was ready to take you on...and then I read the rest of your post. I actually agree with you. Bitch needs to let me show her how to throw a REAL fit. Though, Rahall/Letterman might take issue with the bullet holes in a million dollar car.

Not that you're interested, but D announced last week that she'll be switching teams after this season. (Stop it. You know what I mean, Limpy) I suspect RH paid her back with a shitty car last race.

10:12 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Syd, I would never condemn a woman for getting pissed because her sporting equipment broke. But you've gotta throw it the right way. Bounce your helmet off the windshield. Kick the crap out of the quarter panels. Scream "goddamn it to fucking hell!!!" at the top of your lungs. Pull out a six-shooter and put a couple of holes in the radiator. But don't pout.

10:49 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Heh-heh. Danica's "switching teams" Heh-heh.

10:50 AM  
Blogger Zoe said...

I'll show her how to have temper tantrum. I had to walk away from an umpire last night because if I had not I know I would have been thrown out of the game. Believe me, I did not stamp my feet like a five year old, but I'm sure I could have made a sailor blush. You're right she did just set womens' athletics back a few. Where is Brandi Chastain when you need her? Now that's the kind of controversy I can get behind. A real hero, someone who is willing to rip her jersey off after a big win.

11:47 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

When my brother and I played softball on a town team, he got tossed for swearing after getting thrown out. Even the other team couldn't believe it. If I hadn't hit his arm as he brought it forward, I'm pretty sure he would have it the umpire with the gallon jug of water he threw from across the parking lot.

The moral of the story is that league softball is evil. Or not.

12:10 PM  
Blogger jmeped said...

What girls can race cars???? Shouldn't she be home making a cake or baby or something? ;-) Just kidding she'll just cry and show her boobs and everyone will love her tomorrow. I bet there was a jew under the hood of her car and he fucked it up!

1:23 PM  
Blogger Brighton said...

Oh yeah, that will get male driver's to take women seriously in thier sport...did she break all of her crayons and rip the head off her dolly too?

6:54 PM  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

I have left a message on Meow’s blog comments that you are obsessed with her dancing cat. You may want to follow up with her!

7:39 PM  
Blogger eclectic said...

So, what is the "ned" of a 5-year-old's rope, anyway? ;)

10:05 PM  
Blogger Pud said...

If you ever are misfortunate to have to watch a lot of races, you'll find that most race car drivers are premadonnas about not being able to race. Track racing sucks!

4:01 AM  
Blogger Phollower said...

I'd pay big money to see Danica switch teams. And I ain't talking about leaving Team Letterman. About the only thing hotter than that would be watching her pour milk all over herself after winning the Indy 500. I'd love to see what perverts who are good at Photoshop would do with that little image.

6:29 AM  
Blogger grace said...

You're funny!
Thanks for the laugh, I guess your blog will be my new "guilty pleasure". ;)

grace

9:52 AM  
Blogger little sister said...

All the guys love Danica...because she's the first young and sexy female driver (what-evah).
Wish I'd seen that tantrum she threw!

I went to the Indy 500 once because the tix were given to me. The experience is just turning your head to the right again and again and again. However, my secret redneck guilty pleasure is the drags....fits my attention span, too. Of course, Mr. Wonderful thought it odd when I said the dragsters and funny cars look like really mad kittens with their ears on fire.

lol @ all the switching teams comments!

12:02 PM  

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