Friday, February 23, 2007

Worst Break-Up Ever, Part III

Eventually of course, I managed to figure out enough about women to speak with several, date a few less, and convince one to marry me. And that one was already a U.S. citizen thank you very much! But this isn’t about them. This is about breaking up, which is hard to do, even if you’re a doo-wop singer. There’s a song about it. You can look it up.

During the second semester, we had a “July in February” party. We turned up the heat in the rooms, put together an alcohol-based punch that could have probably fueled NASCAR vehicles, and invited the girls from the next dorm to come over. Later that night I would get my ear pierced for the first time. My friend Don dipped an earring of his own into a capful of whiskey, and then shoved it through my ear. Shockingly, it got infected.

Months later I would look back at that incident as the highlight of the night.

That night, I met Tammy. Which is not her real name. She was really attractive, and like me, a freshman. I had seen her checking me out in the cafeteria for months. But at the time I was far too stupid to realize that she was actually checking me out. I thought I just had food on my face.


Blogger puerileuwaite said...

Holy crap! SIX parts?! Does the worst breakup ever also have to be the longest breakup ever? Even The Judds' Farewell Tour was quicker. The "Lawrence of Arabia" extended director's cut with commentary was shorter. I'll have to go get liquored up and come back ...

1:43 PM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Well, I dealt with it with liquor. No reason you shouldn't.

9:01 AM  
Blogger Lil Bit said...

Yep... I need a liquor drank... sans the earring. LOL

3:23 PM  
Blogger tkkerouac said...


4:51 PM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

For the record, it was sambuca.

And I think I said "ow", not aww.

8:30 AM  

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