Friday, August 03, 2007

Be Vewwy, Vewwy Quiet

We're hunting houses!!

Yep. After 9 years in a house I said we'd live in for 6, (at least according to my wife, who apparently memorizes every promise I make. Bitch), we have outgrown our house. We need to start looking for a new one. We've talked about adding on to our house as well. We have enough land to pull that off nicely, so we can take our time looking for the perfect house. Which in my mind would be between a strip bar and a liquor store, be made out of candy, and cost $4.76, which is about what's left in my 401K after the ever so exciting stock market ride this week.

The good news for us is that our house has more than doubled in value from what we paid for it. This is probably because we bought it from an estate. Always try to buy your real estate from dead people whose relatives live across the country. The word "motivated" doesn't even begin to describe it. "Hell-bent" is more like it.

The bad news is that while our property has doubled+ in value, so has every other piece of property in a 500 mile radius!! Holy shit. Houses that went for $200,000 9 years ago are up around $500,000 now. Couldn't buy it then, can't buy it now.

Tomorrow we're looking at a house located on the water, with a huge yard, double our square footage, a sauna, two outbuildings and an in-law apartment. It seems to be criminally under-priced. I'm looking forward to hearing a disembodied voice hiss "get out" when we walk in. But I'll tell you what, if this place is structurally sound, at this price I'll take my chances with the undead. "Yes, kids, I know they keep grabbing for your brains. Just keep the football hemets on while you;re in the pool and let's all be thankful Daddy can still make the mortgage payments"

18 Comments:

Blogger SoozieQ said...

Why do I start to salivate when I see prices for houses in other states?!? Oh yah, because I live in California where you are anally raped when house hunting. We would not be able to afford the house we live in now at it's current price...oh hell, who am I kidding...we couldn't even afford to buy a house for what we paid for ours 5 years ago (half of what it's worth now)!

We'd have to live in a shack with no running water if we were house hunting now in CA.

In fact, I'd have to pimp out the Hubs just to afford the payments on the shack!

Good luck on the "sounds too good to be true/it's probably on top of an ancient burial site" house!

11:04 AM  
Blogger Party Girl said...

Um, so, is "in-law apartment" code for, PG can come live with us?

11:49 AM  
Blogger Zoe said...

Probably the only nice thing about living in Indiana is affordable housing.

Happy house hunting. I'd avoid the MIL residence though. That's jsut screams intent.

12:18 PM  
Blogger eclectic said...

I don't know man, I saw Nightmare on Elm Street. At least, I saw the first 3 minutes until I ran screaming out of the theater, demanding my money back. **shudder**

1:11 PM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Soozieq, one set of my in-laws live out near LA. There house is about our size and worth in excess of $1 million. They have no yard.

PG, why yes, yes it is. Shit, I may as well take in some cool tenants to pay the mortgage.

Zoe, actually, I think we'd both agree my MIL will never live with us under any circumstances. My wife can take about two hous of her mother's visits, then she's gotta go.

Eclectic, yeah, but you weren't getting a cool house out of the deal now were you?

2:13 PM  
Blogger Rat In A Cage said...

I'd be glad to patrol the grounds at night to battle the undead so a cabana & sauna.

Soozieq is so right. I went over to a friend's place to help him paint, etc before selling & he got $850K for it. It couldn't be worth $150 in most states. Insane & NO YARD, other than the 20 square feet which were just there to be a pain in the ass that had to be watered & mowed. Now that I scrolled down, I see you commented & know this but rather than delete the already known, I just thought I'd type all this additional bullshit.

The Yankees better fucking win tonight. I have to go start my new job on Monday & I want to have some damn fun this weekend which would entail bashing the Royals into oblivion.

Good luck hunting, Mr. Fudd.

3:47 PM  
Blogger Rat In A Cage said...

"for " a cabana. I should proof read BEFORE I publish, not after.

3:48 PM  
Blogger Big Pissy said...

I can't WAIT to hear about the large, under priced house.

Ghostbusters!!

6:55 PM  
Blogger dykewife said...

what is it in the air that so many people are looking for new housing? do me a favour and post any pictures of undead that you find, please? i've not seen a good zombie for some time now...i don't count our old landlord, he's not good at all.

9:57 PM  
Blogger Rhonda said...

The house being located on the water alone should have it at a sky rocketed price.
Can your kids swim?
That alone would be stressful.
We almost bought on a lake once (when boys were little) but I wasn't up for a floater.
I can't help but think of Tom Hanks in Money Pit.
Yet, it sounds like you can plaster...so you should be all good.

Good Luck!
:)

8:56 AM  
Blogger Lil Bit said...

Sounds cool!
Best of luck in the househunting market... and moooooooooving, omg. Moving sucks. lol

9:26 AM  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Too me, housing hunting is a pain in my ass. I have moved too often in my life and hope not to have to again, if the mortgage company decides not to foreclose, of course.

6:03 PM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Rat, if there is a suana, we didn't see it. The tool shed out back felt like one though, as did the attic. Maybe that's what they meant.

BP, I'll post more details later. We really went over the house this afternoon. Lots to think about.

DW, no zombies about the premises, but there's a room in the basement that channels "Silence of the Lambs"

Rhonda, it sounds like I'm plastered? How did you know?

LB, if and when we move, I'm hiring a company to do it for me. I've moved myself for the last time.

Nick, I will cross my fingers you don't have to move again.

9:09 PM  
Blogger Rat In A Cage said...

Forget it then. One thing I can sure say is that after living in southern CA for 9 years (on Monday) I CANNOT imagine ever living in a humid area again. I miss NYC like all hell, but the weather ... the Yankees announcers said it was "sweltering" today - no thanks. I'll just keep visiting in the fall & spring.

9:59 PM  
Blogger Pixie said...

Best of luck!
We are hoping to begin house hunting soon, I am not looking forward to it.

BTW its a wifes job to remember anything that can be held against her man at a later date. ;)

7:36 AM  
Blogger The Recovering Straight Girl said...

A house like you are describing here in the Portland area would run over a million dollars, maybe two, maybe three. Like Soozie, our housing prices are RIDICULOUS and sick.

Don't worry if it's haunted, you can just call that chick from Medium to come over.

10:55 AM  
Blogger Maggie said...

You can always call the ghosthunter guys from T.A.P.S. over for the evening.

However, if they bring the hot irish guy over, he's mine. And you can forget any use of the MIL apartment out back. Just pretend you don't hear anything.

5:42 PM  
Blogger Lady K said...

LMAO! Good luck with THAT venture.

WHO ya gonna call???!

6:16 AM  

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