Brainlock

I can't even come up with a decent title these days. Labor Day Weekend was a little nuts, to say the least. My wife woke up Saturday with a sprained neck, (the answer's no, although I wish I was responsible that way), and wound up going to the ER, where she was given all sorts of good drugs. Subsequently, she spent most of the weekend on the couch in a Vicodin-haze, while I entertained the kids. Sure, I entertained them by letting them draw all over Mommy, but let's not pretend you wouldn't have done the same thing. Also on the schedule for the weekend was a Saturday morning baseball practice at 9 am. I haven't been up that early on a weekend in months, except one time when I was awake at 6 am, but that's only because I hadn't gone to bed yet. The head coach is in Louisiana this week, we have one more practice tomorrow, and then our first game Saturday. This doesn't bode well for my coaching career. I'm not even sure what all the kids names are, and to make things worse, there's a set of twins on the team. I refer to them as "green twin", "red twin", or whatever color shirt they happen to be wearing. I'm sure they love that. Then we went to an agricultural fair in eastern CT where I dragged the kids around for 3-4 hours in 90 degree weather and showed them what prize cows and toothless hillbillies look like, and explained why the former are worth more than the latter. And let my son fire BB pellets out of a machine gun. His mother was less than thrilled about that when we got home. I'm sure my response of "fuck you stoner" didn't help any, but hey, I'm not the one huffing Vicodin.

Actually, she's better now and we have leftovers. The bidding starts at $15 a pill. Don't be shy.

Then I took my son out on the canoe Monday afternoon. Turns out that a 9 year old isn't of much use paddling a canoe into 20 mph winds, and we spent most of our time being blown around the lake. Usually I like getting blown around for an entire afternoon, but not that way. After succesfully battling the elements and returning to shore, I figured out a way to put the canoe on the roof of the car all by my big self, (Hint: just throw the fucking thing up there and worry about the paint job later), and we drove home. Fortunately the canoe didn't decide to start falling off the car until we were 20 yards from the driveway, so that tragedy was averted. Which we followed up with a bonfire in the backyard, (which is even more fun when there's been no rain for two weeks and your yard resembles a tinder factory), complete with S'mores and me getting a second degree burn on my foot when I steeped on a hot ember that came out of the fire-pit.

Subsequently, at this point I'm still pretty tired, especially after staying up until 1 am watching "The Departed", which was good but not great. Mark Wahlberg was underused, a sentence I never thought I'd write.

Hopefully I'll wake up and write more later.