Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Time For Something New

There, that should do it.

I have been busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest lately, hence the lack of content around here. Notice I didn't say the lack of "good" content, since that would imply there ever is any of that. Nope, I've basically been driving around the state to various court appointments, making sure that no one recoveres any money just because my client stored that dynamite in the shed next to the nursery school.

Note that I've never had a case like that, but I do live near a day care center, and if they wake me up one more time, some attorney I know is going to have a case EXACTLY like that. Either that or it's time for me to start raising wolverines.

I did find time to take the kids to New York City last Friday. We went to the Museum of the City of New York, which is sort of weird. First. it's located on the Upper East Side. The way, way, upper east side, like 20 blocks past the fashionable Upper East Side. The subway is fun up there. My kids can read, and now they know some cool new phrases about what Maria likes to do, and more importantly, what Maria's number is. OK, so that was really only important to me.

We went to see the exhibit the museum has on the golden age of baseball in NYC, 1947-57, when the Yankees, Dodgers and Giants were all really good and playing in the World Series pretty much every year, and most importantly, all in the same city. Interesting exhibit, even if it can easily be covered in 2 hours. The only problem is that the museum is incredibly overheated and I nearly fell asleep on several ocassions. They also had a less interesting exhibit on older interior design styles from New York's past. Mostly rich Dutch folk and what their living rooms looked like. My father and I spent a few minutes trying to find a typical Irish house from the 5 Points section would have looked like, but apparently they couldn't find enough filth in time to complete that exhibit. Honestly, it's a wonder my people didn't get right back on the boat and say "fuck it."

Then we went to dinner at a BBQ joint on W 44th called Virgil's. It's not the best BBQ I've ever had, but it is the best I've ever had in Manhattan. And the kids love it, and that's pretty much the most important thing at that point in the evening. Our waiter was very impressed when my son ordered the grilled cheese and the hot dog and then finished both. I was able to feed two adults and two kids, (one of whom was eating 2 meals), for $86, not counting tip. In Manhattan. And it was good and I was stuffed. In short, I love Virgil's. Next time my father and I will probably leave the kids at home and go try the haggis at the Scottish place up the street. I've never had haggis, which as I understand it is basically the internal organs of sheep made into some kind of sausage. Or basically, it's a hot dog. I hear the key is that the more scotch you put away before the meal, the better the haggis. Thank god for the subway and the Metro-North.

I think we'll probably head back to the city before too long. I'd like to see the Broadway show for "Young Frankenstein", and the Museum of Natural History has an exhibit on water that looks like fun for the kids. And then there's that haggis....


Blogger Zoe said...

Life would certainly be more, uh, interesting, if my beloved could bent like that.

1:48 PM  
Blogger Zoe said...

Or bend like that.

1:49 PM  
Blogger Maggie said...

Just keep thinking the haggis is a hotdog. It makes it easier to get down.

3:02 PM  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Remember, when you go back for the haggis (which, unfortunately I have sampled) make sure you have access to at least 2 fifths of Scotch: one to drink before you see the bloody thing and one to quickly wash it and its taste down your throat.

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o the puddin'-race!
Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy of a grace
As lang's my arm.
The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hurdies like a distant hill,
Your pin wad help to mend a mill
In time o need,
While thro your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.
His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An cut you up wi ready slight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like onie ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin, rich!
Then, horn for horn, they stretch an strive:
Deil tak the hindmost, on they drive,
Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyve
Are bent like drums;
The auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
'Bethankit' hums.
Is there that owre his French ragout,
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad mak her spew
Wi perfect sconner,
Looks down wi sneering, scornfu view
On sic a dinner?
Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckless as a wither'd rash,
His spindle shank a guid whip-lash,
His nieve a nit:
Thro bloody flood or field to dash,
O how unfit!
But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread,
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He'll make it whissle;
An legs an arms, an heads will sned,
Like taps o thrissle.
Ye Pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies:
But, if ye wish her gratefu prayer,
Gie her a Haggis!

~ Robert Burns (who else could have written it?)

3:25 PM  
Blogger eclectic said...

It's bloody damn hard to follow a comment like that. Whatever I was gonna say..., nevermind.

Oh, and you can have my share of the haggis.

3:59 PM  
Blogger puerileuwaite said...

The irony is THAT girl would make me INflexible, as I would want to devote my life with her to ONE AND ONLY ONE activity.

However, I would choose to forgo the "Exhibit on Water" in order to stay home and listen to "A Tribute to Rice" on NPR.

And not to be "Mr. Obvious" here, but I would EXPECT the Dutch to be rich, as they never apparently buy anyone else a meal.

Oh, and BTW, the problem is that you were on the "East" Side. The West Side is a whole different story when you just meet a girl named Maria.

4:31 PM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

what does it say about my maturity level that the water exibit sounds interesting?

I would love to visit the Museum of Natural History.

4:38 PM  
Blogger Rat In A Cage said...

I wanted to check out that Museum of NYC when I was there, but didn't have time. I picked up a pamphlet on that exhibit but it wasn't open yet.

I worked 2 blocks from that Virgill's & ate there many times. I was on 43rd & 6th. I walked past it when I was there in September, but didn't eat there.

Glad you had so much fun.

Blowing things up is cool. Apparently, the local authorities were blowing up a school bus at Angels Stadium today to do a terrorist scenario reaction plan. They were REALLY blowing up the bus though. I missed the news to see if it caused accidents on all the freeways as people who didn't kow anything about it heard an explosion & then saw a plume of smoke.

7:44 PM  
Blogger Alkelda the Gleeful said...

The last time I was in NYC, I had such plans for Bede and I to visit old haunts and finally check out the planetarium (that was under construction while I lived there). However, we had our 3 year old daughter in tow and (sweet though she be) it was impossible. NYC is for grownups, really. There are specific things for children, sure, but the city itself? For grownups.

10:15 PM  
Blogger Tai said...

So you only feed your children once in a while? Is that what I'm to understand from this story? Poor things, you should feed them more often so they don't HAVE to order two meals at a time on the rare occasion you deign to feed them.
Also? Can you pass on Maria's number?

10:14 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Zoe, I think you're probably bent enough for the both of you.

Maggie, I've never tried haggis, but it's one of those things to do before I die. Hopefully not because of the haggis.

Nick, I've read that the proper eating of a haggis, in addition to mass consumption of whiskey, involves a fairly elaborate toast to Robert Burns.

Eclectic, Nick did sort of leave everyone in the dust with that didn't he? And there will be no desert for you until you've finished your haggis young lady.

Pug, and after I meet fair Maria, I'll serenade her with Turbonegro's "Blow Me Like The Wind", just to keep with the musical theme.

Alkelda, I agree. My father and I debated hoofing it 30 some odd blocks to see the Frick art collection, (I've been reading books about that time period lately, Lord knows why), and while we could have banged it out in 20 minutes, I think we would have faced a miniature mutiny within 5 blocks from the support troops. Still, I think all kids should get to see parts of NYC; then be left at home while their parents see other parts!

Tai, the sad thing is that they didn't get lunch that day. We were lookin for a Nathan's hot dog place and couldn't find one anywhere on the route. And they wouldn't take a dog from any of the street vendors. Probably a smart decision on their part. Maria's number is 867-5309. Or maybe that was Jenny's number.

10:54 AM  
Blogger CP said...

I'm sorry. I didn't hear anything you said, past that picture. Can you repeat yourself?


11:56 AM  
Blogger Syd said...

God, that sounds like a nearly perfect day!

12:41 PM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

It's ok *sniffle* that you responded to everyone *sniffle* except me.

I mean it's not like you have your very own category in my blogroll or anything ;)

4:48 PM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Holy shit Tysgirl! I scrolled right past you! Unforgiveable on my part.

The Museum of Natural History rocks. And you''re not the only adult, (and I use the term loosely around here), interested in the water exhibit. I think it sounds pretty cool too. But any time I can find something I think is cool AND the kids are into, well, that's just gold.

5:09 PM  
Blogger Big Pissy said...


And I thought the women in my yoga class were flexible!

6:58 PM  
Blogger Suzie said...

Being a vegetarian would prevent me from sampling haggis, correct? For that I'm thankful.

But I am envious of your ability to go to NY so easily. Of all the places I've been, that is by far one of my favorites. I'm just bummed that we've only been there for work purposes and never had time to truly explore the city.

Um and yah....if I could do what that chick in the picture was doing, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't need Icy Heat pads for my sore leg muscles after our long walks.

9:02 PM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

I was poking around the museum's website, pretty cool shit. The Vital Variety exibit looks interesting also. Hell, it all looks interesting when you live in fishbowl like Knoxville.

I'll forgive you just this once, next time you're getting to demoted to the Studs category.

6:15 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

BP, I'm thinking this girl may be a 12th level master.

Soozieq, it's not so much being a vegetarian that excuses you from eating haggis as it is just being smarter than me.

Tysgirl, I'm pretty sure they ahve transportation between Knoxville and NYC. Sure it may involve a horse and buggy at least part of the way, but you could still get up there. I'd even come down and show you some of the sleazier bars.

9:26 AM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

Fuck you. We have cars in Tennessee. It's just that most people aren't smart enough to drive them properly. Luckily, I'm a yankee like you and I know how to drive. Even better, I know how to go online and purchase a plane ticket. I'm smart like that.'re buying drinks, right?

2:12 PM  

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