Friday, February 08, 2008

Finally, A Reason To See A Woody Allen Movie

According to the New York Post, (and more importantly, since I wouldn't wipe my ass with the Post), the new Woody Allen movie will include a "steamy lesbian sex scene" involving Penelope Cruz and Scarlet Johanson

Actually, I probably don't need to see the movie, since it's been playing on more or less of a continuous reel in my head since I learned of this. As more than one person has pointed out, Allen's a creepy little fucker who probably wrote the scene into the movie just so he could watch two hot chicks make out in front of him, but since I've paid good money to watch the same thing in seedy bars, well, who can cast a stone?

You like that kids? "cast a stone"? Who else gives you Biblical references in posts about steamy lesbian sex scenes? No one that's who! And saying "Oh thank you god!!" upon reading this doesn't count.


Blogger Tai said...

I dunno...that's not much of an inducement to see any Woody Allen flick.

I mean, if it was JUST that scene than maybe....

9:58 AM  
Blogger Syd said...

Oh, I'm all over that!!

10:35 AM  
Blogger Zoe said...

I hope he wrote that scene into the movie just to watch those two hot chicks make out, cause that's why I'll be seein this flick. And buying the DVD. I'm not sure I really need the whole movie on DVD, but whatever.

2:05 PM  
Blogger The Recovering Straight Girl said...

Actually Limpy, there are no biblical references to lesbian sex.

2:13 PM  
Blogger Phollower said...

One of many reasons that book kinda sucks.

2:43 PM  
Blogger Phollower said...

Oh, and does saying, "Jesus fucking christ that was some hot girl on girl action" count as a biblical reference?

2:45 PM  
Blogger eclectic said...

Well, at least it finally explains his first name... albeit I'm totally creeped out now.

3:24 PM  
Blogger eclectic said...

(By the idea of Woody sporting a... y'know, woody. That's just wrong.) And I'm creeped out even more just typing it. I have to leave here now.

3:26 PM  
Blogger Rat In A Cage said...

Yeah, I was thinking what tai said - maybe after it comes out someone can utube just that scene. I'll have to netflix it & fast forward to just that seen, but I hadn't heard about this at all so thanks for the news.

Great comments from everyone. Looks like you have a smart crowd reading you. How the hell did you pull that off?

7:27 PM  
Blogger Maggie said...

Yea, but if Woody Allen himself is in the movie watching it or, Gawd forbid, making a running commentary, it's going to completely ruin the whole scene.

7:34 AM  
Blogger Party Girl said...

Scarlet, much like Angelina, I would watch read the phone book while they took a crap, that is how beautiful I think they are.

8:24 PM  
Blogger puerileuwaite said...

Sorry, but Woody's films stretch reality a wee bit too much for Yours Truly.

A lesbian couple where BOTH of them are hot?

Oh, and let me guess: Woody's character scores with one of them.

I have an easier time believing that Ewoks actually could overthrow the Empire.

10:45 AM  
Blogger Sugar Smacks said...

At least we don't have to look at Woody's butt cheeks the way Michael Douglas makes us do while he bangs the female costars in his films.

I only ever really liked "Bullets Over Broadway" anyway. Jennifer Tilly is hott...

6:18 PM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Tai, still, as inducements go, it's pretty damn good.

Syd, I'd be surprised if ypu weren't volunteering to crew that film.

Zoe, it's certainly why I would've writtne a scene like that. Oddly, the women I know never fall for the old "Hey, I've got a part in this movie for you" line when I use it. Probably because I'm not a creepy old guy banging his stepdaughter.

RSG, they're aren't any dinosuars either.

Phollower, there are some awesome kill scenes in it. Whole cities burned, chicks turned to salt, neat shit like that. "Christianity hits the spot/12 apostles that's a lot/the Holy Ghost and a virgin too/Christianity we're for you"

Phollower, and uh, no, that doesn't count, although I'd probably agree with the sentiment.

Eclectic, thank you for that thought. Please feel free to never share it again.

Rat, they are smart aren't they? I'm not sure what they're doing here. probably slumming.

Maggie, oh dear Jesus, (hey, the Bible!), can you imagine that. Whacking/rubbing off to Scarlet and Penelope and all of a sudden there's Allen wandering into the frame and kvetching about his trouble with relationships. Shit, I'd swear off sex for, uhm, ah, at least as long as it took him to get out of frame.

PG, that sentiment is either poetically disgusting or disgustingly poetic, but either way, they're both really hot.

Pug, dude those Ewoks totally OWNED the empire!!! Don't you remember? They harnessed the power of LUMBER!!!

Sugar smacks, I haven't watched a Michael Douglas film in years, but I will say that I used to think Catherine Zeta-Jones was really hot, and then she married that bag of dust and now when I see her I just feel icky.

8:33 PM  

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