Monday, June 09, 2008

Why I Shouldn't Coach Your Kid: Part Infinity +1

Last night, after the thunderstorms had cleared and the temperature was back up to about 93, we had Little League practice, to which a total of 4 kids, (who are going to start tonight), showed up. One of them is the manager's son. I was throwing batting practice. He likes to talk crap, so as he walked up the batter's box he announces that if I hit him he's going to charge the mound "like Coco Crisp."

I hit him with the first pitch.

I could totally kick Coco's ass anyway.

(Cedar, I'm in the mid-70's! Hang on!)

16 Comments:

Blogger Syd said...

Valuable lesson. Somebody has to teach the little fuckers when & where to talk smack.

10:25 AM  
Blogger Lil Bit said...

LOL, soooooo that's where the boy got his pitching skills... from, DAD!! ;)

ps. going to comment on next post... (just so ya don't MISS it. ;P)

10:59 AM  
Blogger Zoe said...

Well done limpy, smoeone's gotta teach those little bastards a lesson.

Funny, I see syd and I are on the same page here.

11:09 AM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

They're already talking smack at 9 years old?

sigh

I'm so not ready to be a parent.

11:57 AM  
Blogger eclectic said...

Well Tysgirl, it's age nine only because this kid wasn't Limpy's kid, who's probably been talking smack since a considerably younger age... what with the survival instinct and all. And anyway, who lists "Coco Crisp" as their hero?! Clearly, the kid needed an "HBP".

12:54 PM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

True that, Eclectic.

If it's a matter of survival, I'm guessing my pink dolphin (as cocowiley likes to call it) is probably already cocking off.

1:01 PM  
Blogger Cedar said...

lil bit, that is exactly what I thought when I read his post. That is where his son learned to bean the batter. That twig did not fall far from the tree and it may be just as twisted.

1:08 PM  
Blogger Party Girl said...

Well, I think he totally deserved it and I would have done the same.
Surprising? Probably not, except that I would have laughed hysterically afterwards...then I would have felt bad. (maybe)

1:49 PM  
Blogger Sylvia said...

So did you kick little "Coco"'s ass?

7:46 PM  
Blogger Rhonda said...

I need this laugh!!!

7:58 AM  
Blogger Rhonda said...

needed.
needed is what I meant.

7:59 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Syd, better they learn now than later on in the back of some biker bar.

LB, got it, and I responded. My son's a far better pitcher than I was at his age. Kind of scary how good he is sometimes.

Zoe, clearly not the only ting you have in common.

Tysgirl, please. They've BEEN talking smack for awhile now. Unless you have a girl, get ready for your newborn to tell some other kid in the nursry that he "owns your ass" after a game of catch the pacifier.

Eclectic, exactly. Any kid who openly worships all of the Red Sox better not dig in when I'm pitching.

Tysgirl, "pink dolphin"?

Cedar, my son is very much like me, except clearly destined to be a better athlete.

PG, the only one laughing harder than me was his father.

Sylvia, no. Little Coco dropped his bat and pretended to charge the mound. He though better of it when I dropped my glove. I was going to give him a pretend wrestling body slam, but it was just too hot.

Rhonda, glad to provide it.

8:20 AM  
Blogger tysgirl said...

Puh-leeze. Do you really think being a girl is going to stop my kid from talking smack? I thought you knew me better than that.

Pink Dolphin, cocowiley's comment.

Ahem, still waiting for the rest of that list you owe me.

8:50 AM  
Blogger limpy99 said...

No, you're just going to have to teach her, so it might take a whole week.

Looks more like a beluga whale than a dolphin to me. We've gota few at a local aquarium and they sort of do look like that.

10:22 AM  
Blogger puerileuwaite said...

Coco Crisp isn't a good baseball name anyway. Who was batting cleanup? Captain Crunch? Jeez.

2:34 PM  
Blogger Rat In A Cage said...

That's fucking funny. First pitch. Good for you!

7:01 PM  

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